Talia, The Queen's Own (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
thequeensown) wrote2011-05-25 12:53 pm
thequeensown) wrote2011-05-25 12:53 pm
2nd Sending [Audio/Commentlog]
[Much has been happening in the past week or so, and a good portion was not good. Some creature ransacked the Keep during the night and attacked several people that she knows and one that she shares her life with. After assuring that Kevas was bandaged and on his feet (protests be damned), she had taken to heart the matter of a certain missing raptor.
Shaka was nowhere to be found and Talia was beginning to think that the creature would not be seen again.
And then there was the matter of Sollux and poor Isabella, also victims of the recent attacks .. Talia was concerned about the young bard and troll (whether he wanted that concern or not).
Having not see Coen in a few days, Talia goes with the way she knows best to find him and the others.]
Coen .. if I might have a moment of your time when you are able?
[Yes, Coen. Accept it now, sweet cakes, cause it ain't gonna change anytime soon. :D]
Kevas, I've seen nothing of Shaka these past few days, whether inside or outside of the stables. I will inform you if this changes, or I learn anything ..
Sollux and Isabella ..
[Here there is a brief pause, her concern evident in her tone.]
I pray that you are both feeling better .. 'Bella .. when you feel up to it, and in your own good time, I have located the Bower and a most suitable harp .. I would love to play for you if you are still interested.
Shaka was nowhere to be found and Talia was beginning to think that the creature would not be seen again.
And then there was the matter of Sollux and poor Isabella, also victims of the recent attacks .. Talia was concerned about the young bard and troll (whether he wanted that concern or not).
Having not see Coen in a few days, Talia goes with the way she knows best to find him and the others.]
Coen .. if I might have a moment of your time when you are able?
[Yes, Coen. Accept it now, sweet cakes, cause it ain't gonna change anytime soon. :D]
Kevas, I've seen nothing of Shaka these past few days, whether inside or outside of the stables. I will inform you if this changes, or I learn anything ..
Sollux and Isabella ..
[Here there is a brief pause, her concern evident in her tone.]
I pray that you are both feeling better .. 'Bella .. when you feel up to it, and in your own good time, I have located the Bower and a most suitable harp .. I would love to play for you if you are still interested.
[text]
The pause before answering is noticeable.]
I am at the chapel, My Lady.
[Audio --> Commentlog]
[And she's off, pausing by her room at the barracks long enough to procure her borrowed harp and is then on her way. It's several minutes later, but she steps into the familiar and comforting chapel.
She exhales softly, just taking in the soothing surroundings and then her eyes scan the pews for the familiar form of Isabella.]
[Commentlog]
Good day, My Lady. It is a pleasure to see you again.
[Talia would notice the scars on her face coming closer, they are white and thin but were not there the last they had met. ]
[Commentlog] Your new icons are really cute!!
And a good day to you as well, Isabella ..
[She is close enough to see though scars, standing out only just as pale lines across her lightly toned skin. She steps up to the young woman and gently lifts a hand to her cheek. However, she meets 'Bella's gaze evenly and touches the same hand to the left side of her face and the jagged scar that runs from temple to chin, only barely missing her eye. Her smile never slips, but there is a certain determination in her gaze when she speaks next.
There are any number of other scars beneath her tunic, wrapping around her torso, that match that on her face.]
They make us stronger .. never think yourself any less beautiful for then, for you are not. You are beautiful still, inside and out, and they make not a damnable difference.
[It sounds like she's given this speech before .. more than likely had it told to her as well. She searches Isabella's gaze briefly and then her expression softens and her hand draws away.]
May I play for you?
[Commentlog] Thank you! I so need more
Then her eyes widen as young woman lifts her hand. It was unexpected. And gentle though the gesture may be, there is much hesitation on Isabella's part. The only hands that were raised to her, were not ones of kindness like this. She meets the eyes of Talia and glances over to the scars there.
She had taken in the facial scars when they had first met, but it was another thing in the light of this. Oh Talia, she wished right now that she could have that fire in your eyes for her own! Instead she's left with a feeling of defenselessness and shame.
Memories of a younger time surge, unwanted, and she forces them down and in. Feathers twitch. She knows of this speech too. But had never heard it from someone else's mouth before.
It bolsters her a little but, she is still unable to quite control her voice when she speaks out. It comes out in a quick squeak. ]
Yes! Please.
[Commentlog]
Even so, she smiles in response and takes the bardic harp from its carrying case and settles onto one of the pews. She strums a few times, adjusting the strings as needed to finish tuning the piece. When she is satisfied in a way that would leave Jadus happy, she begins to play.
It's a silly song, but her voice is clear and true. Jadus had once told her that she'd been Gifted enough that Bardic might have taken her in if she had not been Chosen first.
When the notes of the first song come to an end and she feels that she has properly warmed her voice for further singing, she changes to another song altogether, this one not a song of her childhood, but of what life as a Herald means.]
[Commentlog]
She listens with two minds. The first is the part of her that files the notes away, keeps the tune intact and notes the technical aspect. It is the second that cracks a smiles on her face as she realizes it is a song that is being sung to sheep of all things.
She was taking pleasure in listening to the music, the voice was true, the fingers sure.
So when Talia switched songs, Isabella was pulled along with her. It was different all together to be sure. It quieted the amusement she had been feeling. This was more than a song, it was a pledge. It was not something that Isabella herself would ever repeat but was something that held a wealth of knowledge within in. Speaking of a kind of people that were noble and honorable. Perhaps only a song-creed that could be sung by the ones taking it?
Isabella does not feel that clapping would be appropriate after such a song but she offers a smile when she speaks.]
Beautiful, My Lady! You could ply the trade better than most I would say.
[The pause is brief but the curiosity is there in spades.]
The last song? Was that a song of your kingdom? A knight's pledge?
[ Your pledge?]
[Commentlog!]
She smiles softly in return, lips quirked a bit.]
Not as good as some, but I thank you sincerely .. It's been far too long since I last played.
[She strokes the harp almost lovingly, her gaze distant for a moment before Isabella's next question is voiced. She looks to her again, nodding.]
The Herald's creed, yes .. The vow we make to country and kingdom. My vow.
[Yes, 'Bella, she caught that unasked question.]
[commentlog]
Always a bigger fish... as the saying is, right? I do mean the words though, I hope to hear more of your playing.
[Then she almost literally brightened. She could have been a cat in a past life when certain things catch her curious and in need of itching that scratch. ]
Your vow? What a kingdom you have then.
[ What a character you have also... there was admiration on her face. She had heard of stories of those of virtue, but never a pledge like this. Nor met anyone who had taken it.]
If it is not against your vows or duty, can I ask how one becomes a Herald? Must you preform a task of some kind? Are you of a noble bloodline?
[commentlog]
Nay, fair Lady. There is nothing that says I cannot speak of what a Herald is or does. We actually encourage such conversation, as it's better that the people know what you are and do than the opposite. Not telling simply makes them believe us fearsome and untrustworthy .. Although the former can be no less true at certain times.
There is no bloodlines that discerns who will become a Herald, as we have those in our midst that are simple peasants .. [She dips her head to indicate herself.] and those of royalty, such as our own Queen and her daughter, to whom I am sworn to serve and protect above all else. A Herald must have bravery and valor .. They must be trustworthy and willing to give everything to serve the people and crown. They must be willing to die for what we have sworn .. and many do. A Herald's life is not a long one, more often than not.
[The last is said matter of fact, but her tone is far more sober than it had been.]
Many of us are Gifted .. that is, we have magic abilities that we were born with. Empathy, Fetching, Far seeing and other Gifts. I, for example, am an empath. I can read the emotions of those around me .. and I can alter them. It's, perhaps, the worst Gift of all in that it is guided by a persons own moral standing. I had much to prove to the people, so they would not think i would abuse my Gift in order to sway the Queen, whom I serve directly. I never would have, but many of the people do not know what it means to be Chosen..
[Ooooo. Did you hear the inflection change of that word, Isabella? Sounds pretty important, yes? :D]
[commentlog]
She did not expect any less from one who was so oathsworn to kingdom and country to live very long, but still it turns a quiet frown on her face. She hoped the Herald in front of her would not share that in that fate. She liked the woman.
At first she tilts her head curiously at the mention of magical Gifts and influences. Most of those sounded to be born with, the things that can not be taught. She did not know how to take the admission of having empathy strong enough to control emotions. She's heard of bards with that power- but this did not sound like the sway of music.
She's perplexed, it almost sounds like a warning... For what end though, Isabella did not know.
What she did know on the other hand, was a lead in for a story and that was plain as day. Isabella was more than inclined to be led in this story that Talia was telling.]
What does it mean to be Chosen?
[commentlog] ANGST IS GO! :D 1/2
Her explaining empathy to Isabella was both a warning and not. Talia had no intentions of using her Gift for ill, or for harming anyone with it (cause she can do that too, you know!), but she felt that those she would call friend deserved to know. There had been too many instances of lies being spread through the Collegium for her to not be wary of such happening again.
She had lost control of her abilities once, those many years ago, and though she did not plan on such being a repeat offense, it was best that people were prepared for what she was capable of .. wasn't it?
At Isabella's question she falls silent, her gaze growing distant. There it was .. a question she both dreaded and hoped for. To speak of this meant she had to speak of Rolan, and that was a wound that would never fully heal.
When she speaks, her voice is initially soft and a bit strained, but she continues and it clears. She goes almost into a state of Recall, a trance that allows a Herald to parrot back information with perfect recollection. However, she's only halfway into the trance, her own emotions distracting her.]
To understand what it means to be Chosen is to first understand Companions.. Companions are highly intelligent magical creatures who look like, but are not, white horses with silver hooves and sapphire eyes. The Companions first appeared from a grove near the palace in Haven, in response to King Valdemar's prayer. Though the first Companions were all Grove-Born, later generations were born in the manner of normal horses.
They are both the returned spirits of departed Heralds and Companions, as well as divine agents or "avatars" of our gods. Companions take great pains to reveal that they are both fallible and mortal. When a Companion or Herald dies, he or she is sent to a "resting place" where they can recover from their recent life. After a time they are given the choice of returning as a Companion, with all memory of their past life intact, or to lose all of their old memories and become a human baby destined to become a Herald. Not all Heralds are returned from previous lifetimes, many are "new souls" who are then judged/weighed by the Companions to join the ranks of the Heralds.
These spirits are not allowed to return as Companions within the lifetime of the people they knew to avoid emotional entanglements such as Choosing their own child, or revealing themselves to their former lover.
[commentlog] THE ANGST!!!!! 2/2
[She pauses here for a moment before continuing, not realizing that there are tears in her eyes that have formed while she spoke.]
Each Herald has such a Companion. Companions "Choose" Heralds in the trainee or apprentice stage.
The Choice bonds Companions to their Heralds into a mutual relationship, and the bond can affect both parties' spiritual and physical well-being. The Companion becomes a loving friend who guides, supports, and sometimes augments a Herald's abilities. The joining is known to strengthen the Herald's Gifts, especially Mindspeech. The Choice is, for the most part, permanent; it can be broken while in its early stages, although doing so will physically and emotionally scar both parties. After the initial phase, however, the bond becomes so important that the loss of either Herald or Companion is followed by depression and almost always death. Despite this a Companion can break the bond .. repudiate .. with their Chosen if at any time, they believe the Herald or Herald Trainee to have become unworthy.
The defining factor of one's Choosing seems to rely on the individual's moral fiber and where applicable, their ability to provide something that is needed by Valdemar, at the time.
[She stumbles to a halt here, tears slipping down her cheeks as she forces herself to swallow. She exhales shakily, and turns to look at Isabella again, almost having forgotten the young woman was with her, listening.]
I fell into Rolan's eyes when he came to me .. I'd found something I'd never known I was missing. Weighed and measured and found worthy of his unconditional love and acceptance. [Her voice hitches.] Always at the edge of my mind .. always able to find me .. [Her hazel gaze finds Isabella's and it is full of pain that she keeps to herself, pain that she keeps tightly shielded, even from Kevas.] The End .. It kil- .. [She falters there, unable to voice aloud that he was dead. That just made it all the more real and she still could not believe that he was gone from her forever. She chokes out the next words .. shields so tightly clamped that she'll have a headache for it later.]
H-he .. He was my soul ..
Heartstrings.... youhavethem.
The longer the accounting went on, the farther it began to delve into personal matters. Like snow falling down a mountainside, it started a cascade.
Seeing the tears in Talia's eyes caused a pain deep within Isabella's chest.
She could not be unaffected by this, not in the least. To sit here and hear the emotions in Talia's voice, read it in her body and not react would take a heart of solid stone. The bard was not made of that stern stuff. When Talia plunged into the drawbacks and consequences of Companion and Herald, her own breath hitched. You did not need to be a seer to see where the tale would lead.
When she heard the name Roland she knew.
When hazel eyes met green and the bard saw the jagged pain laying there, her own eyes welled with witnessing it.
When the young woman in front of her chokes on words that were pain-filled to even mentally recount.... the half-angelic moves.
She did not know if it was right, or proper, or acceptable. She could not know how the Herald would react. The little voices inside of the bard that reminded her of manners and procedures for everyday life, were struck dumb. Hearing Talia's voice break was the final blow.
A rustle of feathers accompanies the bard as she puts awkward arms around Talia.
They might hold her too tight in one place, too loose in another and there is no motherly bosom that Talia could find solace in. Isabella does her best to comfort, unpracticed as she is, and will share in your pain and bleed a little with you. ]
/plays them better than the harp! :D
Her Companion .. the other half of her soul .. was dead; murdered by the End as it consumed all the worlds it passed. The crew and survivors had been forced to 'kill' them yet again when they made the choice to deny the End and fight against it.
Though the reality of Rolan's death could not be denied, there had been no time to properly mourn while upon the Elegante and the Shore. Too busy trying to survive to properly grieve, the Herald kept the festering wound to herself. Her shields became her lifeline, protecting those around her from what she could not allow herself to fall into.
Not even to Kevas would she show the full weight of her pain, knowing the he himself was facing more than his own weight with the loss of his daughter and friends.
Ever self-sacrificing, the Herald put the need and pain of others before herself as she always would.
Isabella's comfort, confused and uncertain as it may be, is more than she's ever allowed herself and she crumples beneath its offering. She clutches at the angel girl as she is pulled gently into her arms, body wracked with sobs. She cares not that Isabella is younger and unpracticed, taking far more solace from her than the girl might realize.
There is nothing pretty about this .. grief in it's finest and most raw. Even losing Dirk, her soul mate, had not been as painful as accepting the loss of the one being that knew and loved her above all else. Still, she keeps the emotional weight to herself, wishing in no way to share this sorrow with anyone more than she already is.]
*CRAI*
She can not speak. Nor will she. There was nothing she felt she could say that would ease this kind of grief.
Her good wing moves with Isabella and instinctively tries to cup around Talia, shielding them both partly. ]